The Best Response

The best response ever.


At Least He’s Honest?

Honesty is the best policy, my momma always told me…


Best Profile Ever

best profile ever

Gender Rosetta Stone

Girl to her Best Friend: “So who is going to be there?”

Translates to: “Anyone new I haven’t made out with already?”

Girl after a Breakup: “It’s time for a change.”

Translates to: ” I need a haircut and a vacation and I swear to God if I do not Eat, Pray, Love, Julia Roberts is getting a beat down.”

Girl about Another Girl: “She’s cute.”

Two Translations…

Translates to: “She isn’t that cute but she is my friend and she is really smart and funny.” orrrr it means,

“Ewww, she is gross, but if I don’t say this, they are gonna call me a hater again.”

Girl to her friend when finding out she is going back to an Ex: “I’ll be here to support you no matter what you decide.”

Translates to: “Are you F-ing serious, I am writing an anonymous note to your mother. I know you are not this dumb!”

Girl about a Song: “Omg, I love this song!!!!!!”

Translates to: “I’m so super sloppy druuuuunk!”

Girl on the Perfect Guy: “I want a guy who is ripped, chizzled, and manly. But also, has a sensitive side and cares about what I have to say.”

Translates to: “Gay guys are so lucky.”

Guy to Girl: “I don’t like skinny girls, I like a girl with a little meat on her bones…”

Translates to: “You know your no sketator, you are borderline, so if we date, it ends here. NO CHEAT DAYS or CARB SUNDAYS.”

Guys Say: ” I like a girl who is low maintenance, natural, not a lot of makeup. ”

Translates to: “Kim Kardashian is the hottest chick on the planet”

Guy to Guy Friend: “Ugh, this girl keeps blowing me up. She wants it.”

Translates to: ” I mean, I text her every single weekday, all day. But ya know when the weekend comes I like to throw her off with a little hard to get and make her think she is nuts.”

Guy About a Friend that is a Girl: ” No, no, it’s not like that. She is awesome. Like one of my best friends. She can totally be one of the guys but she just so happens to be ridiculously hot too. I could never date her.”

Translates to: “I am a moron.”

At Least He is Bi-Lingual